All the Things I Love, the Sands Have Covered with Memory

after Samuel Adeyemi. for my father, Sarkin Pawa and my loves.

I’m sorry I took this long to mourn. My people,
It takes a lot to break through an already
Broken body. What doesn’t scare me these days?
The seeping of light from the green fields.
Through my window and into my skin.
I am so grateful. That all the things that happened to me
Did not leave me lifeless. I promise you, I do not like
This life much, but I appreciate every soft thing
That has touched me. I promise, my father’s voice
Is a song I can never forget. Forget music,
Wisdom rests in people more than it does in words.
We buried my people and we buried the rest
Of ourselves in loneliness. When I gather
The remnants of chaos, I start with my people’s
Cries in memories. Sarkin Pawa had a touch
Of tenderness before the bandits invaded.
My people were soft spots even after the attacks.
Guns in the air, bullets coordinating the assembly
Of lost soldiers. Who knew a home this exquisite
Would be pulled down by faith? Who knew a body
This black could be folded into frailty the size of loss?
My people were rainbows on white walls, but who
Knew something this beautiful was fated to fade?
In silence, I cannot find a compromise, only restlessness,
Only pain. But like every good son, I still love my people
I still love their silence & in some folklore, silence
Would always mean freedom. My people are free means
This is how they want to be remembered:
Starling murmurations as beautiful as God.